Someday soon we will get a day off from school and I'll stop sounding like I need to be on antidepressants.

i feel like i never move.
all day i go up and down stairs and into and out of classrooms
i go to the third floor, third floor
i go to the first floor
i go to the third floor, third floor
i go to the second floor
i go to the third floor.

all day i walk and sit and listen and scribble like the mad hatter
and in the afternoon i walk into and out of parking lots
into and out of my bedroom
into and out of the kitchen
and still i feel like i never move.
every time i stand up it is to get to a place where i will sit down and scribble
like the mad hatter
mad scribbler
mad mad mad
words on paper.

i never move and i am always tired.
i get up and im tired
walk up and down stairs tired
go home tired
scribble at home tired
go to sleep tired (eventually)
and i get up and im tired.

i am tired of walking up and down stairs and never moving and always being tired.
i am tired of writing my name on my paper
i am tired
of my hips and my arms and my stomach
all feeling the same between my thumb and pointer finger.
i am tired of raising my hand
touching my face
tying my shoes
sliding down
pulling my hair
curling my toes.

i intend to jump and breathe at the same time
i intend to sleep until i wake up
not until i am woken up
i intend to be beautiful, fabulous, talented
i intend to be walking up and down stairs for ten more years, at least.
all that matters is that i sleep
(and i will
but when i wake up
i will still be tired)