A Regression

heres my rotten day, in weird unhappy stream of consciousness type dribblydrabble.

the morning, by third i wanted to scream and red red and i hate not knowing. it put off my whole day, languages, short temper, frustration, jealousy, all day. by 2 i gave up and talked to everyone i could find, help please, ask someone else, so i did and i did and i did. im nervous, im afraid, im inferior. council, principality? why be so tedious? so i go and i ask and i rephrase, and almost nothing, come back tomorrow, probably not. it has nothing to do with you. no no no. so its hot and im running to the bathroom to the only place in this huge brick building with a little door i can close, and im running and its hot and i sit. and i sit and its hot and the water is hot and drip drops off my eyeballs and i have to hold my breath to breathe, to be quiet. so come back tomorrow. now the water is cold and drip drops out of the sink and all over my head, and i have to go home, and im sitting in the car and im home, chocolate, wasting time. i have no willpower or will to do what i need to do. i dont know what i need to do but i know this isnt it. i know if i keep doing what im doing it isnt what i need to be doing. there are too many people and no way to make .04% of someones problem matter because all my problem is is .04% of someone elses problem.